Actually, I do know. Even you, a 50 year old over-the-hill woman, puts up a picture online and 100 men flock to your inbox within the hour all wanting to date. BOO HOO, how terrible for you! You then--being unappreciative of the undeserved abundance you have--reject probably 95 of those guys for superficial reasons neverminding that you yourself are 50 and way past the age where you can compete with younger women, not realizing that the only reason these men are messaging you at all is because they know you're likely to be an easier lay than the younger women.
This project was supported by Grant Number 90EV0426 from the Administration on Children, Youth and Families, Family and Youth Services Bureau, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. The opinions, findings, conclusions and recommendations expressed in this publication are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Administration on Children, Youth and Families, Family and Youth Services Bureau, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
My opinion about why personality is not the best way to go alone. first off as a man of almost 50yrs I have to say dating women based solely on personality doesn't not work. Birds and other animals don't just choose buy looks so neither should humans. I tried many of the so called online dating sites and I tried meeting in real places. Online dating is a true fantasy of BS. Lets be honest to ourselves. When you are out looking in the real world you have specific things you are looking for before you even get to personality. That could range from eyes to legs breasts or bottoms and in most cases all of the above. This is a part of dating that has been omitted by all online dating sites who claim to be the real deal when it comes to love. In reality this is a pure fantasy made of lies created by magazines and polls most don't have the guts to answer truthfully. For example, Size doesn't matter.... BS. I don't care who you are size does matter in one way or another and I don't mean just the sex parts. Just like other animals in the world humans have the things that attract and using an algorithm based on just a couple of people isn't going to find anyone true love because it is already breaking the number one rule of dating. You are beginning on a lie but in our day of political correctness people have been led to believe they can find true love based on questions about personality only and showing a few pictures. Be honest and admit the truth, if you like big butts you are looking for a woman with that feature first and foremost. Same goes for women, the only true statement out there in the online dating world is there is someone for everyone. Problem is as long as we are offended by our choices of body type no one is going to find permanent true love. Even if it works out in getting married this is likely not going to last as you are denying one of the primal instincts you hunt with. Granted you will have to settle in some ways but your basic types are not what you are truly happy settling for. Example for me? I look for Eyes, boobs and legs before approaching a woman. Then I look for personality honesty and baggage. Last I look to see how much she indulges in drinking, food, smoking and drugs. If this woman meets those basic traits then I ask her out. If she is missing just one of those basic things I pass on her because they are essential to my happiness. Then it is her turn on my part, I must match her idea of perfect match. In reality, none of these things are accepted as true choices for online dating. Size does matter for everything and there is no way curvy is another word for obese to be blunt. Every person has a range of acceptable and not one of these sites allows you to use what really matters to each and every person out there. Even fetish sites devoted to the more grotesque aspects of the dating personality barely skim what it takes to really find what you are looking for. In honesty people should not be ashamed of what they have. This is something society has posed as how it should be and that is a total lie. If I want a woman with a bra size of DD or bigger I should be able to list that with no discrimination just like eye color. Love is not a general thing and neither should being able to profess what you are looking for if you truly want to find your match. If you are a person who is ashamed of what you have being described then you shouldn't be surprised when you get something you don't really want. I can't be anymore blunt than this. Those women offended by what a man wants or men feeling the same should really take into consideration and be honest with yourselves that it hurts much more in the long run not starting out with what you want being honest up front than having each of your expectations destroyed by the lies we do now. Best example is breast size and nipple size for women and penis size for men. If I am on a date with a woman wearing a pushup bra or a bra consealing her true nipple size, she is going to hate me very much when I get that thing off of her. I don't do lies and this to me is worse than a lie. She would be dumped right then and there. Same goes with if I put a sock in my pants to make it bigger, do you honestly think the woman who chooses me is going to stay once the truth is exposed? Hell no she won't. So why be offended by body types being listed with parts? I find that more shallow than being honest. I don't want to be with a woman who really wants a huge penis because this will affect her sexually and emotionally accepting me for my 5 1/4 inch. So in the same manner why should a woman want me to accept her for having breasts or other parts that don't match my expectations just to get her personality. This is going to affect both personalities in the long run and ruin what you have which is why I said this is the same as starting based on a lie.
Generally, during much of recorded history of humans in civilization, and into the Middle Ages in Europe, weddings were seen as business arrangements between families, while romance was something that happened outside of marriage discreetly, such as covert meetings.[7] The 12th-century book The Art of Courtly Love advised that "True love can have no place between husband and wife."[7] According to one view, clandestine meetings between men and women, generally outside of marriage or before marriage, were the precursors to today's dating.[7]
Speed dating consists of organized matchmaking events that have multiple single persons meet one-on-one in brief timed sessions so that singles can assess further whether to have subsequent dates. An example is meeting perhaps twenty potential partners in a bar with brief interviews between each possible couple, perhaps lasting three minutes in length, and shuffling partners. In Shanghai, one event featured eight-minute one-on-one meetings in which participants were pre-screened by age and education and career, and which costs 50 yuan ($6 USD) per participant; participants are asked not to reveal contact information during the brief meeting with the other person, but rather place names in cards for organizers to arrange subsequent dates.[81] Advantages of speed dating: efficiency; "avoids an embarrassing disaster date"; cost-effective; way to make friends.[81] Disadvantages: it can turn into a beauty contest with only a few good-looking participants getting most offers, while less attractive peers received few or no offers; critics suggest that the format prevents factors such as personality and intelligence from emerging, particularly in large groups with extra-brief meeting times.[157]

For most people, falling in love usually seems to just happen. It’s preserving that “falling in love” experience that requires commitment and work. Given its rewards, though, it’s well worth the effort. By taking steps now to preserve or rekindle your falling in love experience, you can build a meaningful relationship that lasts—even for a lifetime.


Why does sex decline in marriage? It’s a combination of factors — sometimes it’s a health issue, the presence of children, boredom or unhappiness in the relationship. But a major factor is age. One study found sexual frequency declines 3.2 percent a year after the age of 25. The good news is that what married couples lack in quantity they make up for in quality. Data from the National Health and Social Life Survey found that married couples have more fulfilling sex than single people.
I was scared shitless and grabbed the hot pan off the stove and wound it up over my shoulder ready to swing it like a baseball bat, and I screamed at the top of my lungs "get the fuck out of here! Help! Someone help!" The guy backed into the hallway and I chased him that way screaming as loud as I could "get on outta here. out. out!!" And he was slowing down which spooked me because I was worried he was about to try something. I saw him moving towards the living room door rather than the door out, and I screamed at him that he'd best get the fuck out right now, or else I was getting my gun. (That was a lie, I don't have a gun, but I was panicking.)
Let’s be honest, the internet is really just a super elaborate and sophisticated farce designed to distract you from having your pockets picked by greasy conmen in cheap suits, right? Not quite, but it is full of unscrupulous vendors looking to separate you from your money by whatever means possible (in other news, have you heard about the secret to getting killer abs in less than 7 minutes using this 1 weird trick…?).
Romantic encounters were often described with French terms like rendezvous or tête-à-tête. The German term of Stelldichein (as translated by Joachim Heinrich Campes) is used to signify dating when the age of consent to marriage was relatively high. German traditions to signify lovers who met in hiding were described with terms like Fensterln (windowing) or Kiltgang (dawn stroll) used in Bavaria and Switzerland.[132] Analyst Sebastian Heinzel sees a major cultural divide between American dating habits and European informality, and leads to instances in which European expatriates in cities such as New York keep to themselves.[133]
To me, like everything else, this comes back to the respect thing. If you have two different individuals sharing a life together, it’s inevitable that they will have different values and perspectives on some things and clash over it. The key here is not changing the other person—as the desire to change your partner is inherently disrespectful (to both them and yourself)—but rather it’s to simply abide by the difference, love them despite it, and when things get a little rough around the edges, to forgive them for it.
While technically a free site, PlentyofFish offers you the option to purchase a membership upgrade. This allows you to find out who’s viewed your profile, find out if your messages were read or deleted, browse ad-free, send unlimited gifts, and increase your profile’s traffic. Upgrading costs $35.40 for three months, $51.00 for six months, or $81.40 for one year.
The other “wrong” reason to enter into a relationship is, like Greg said, to “fix” yourself. This desire to use the love of someone else to soothe your own emotional problems inevitably leads to codependence, an unhealthy and damaging dynamic between two people where they tacitly agree to use each other’s love as a distraction from their own self-loathing. We’ll get more into codependence later in this article, but for now, it’s useful to point out that love, itself, is neutral. It is something that can be both healthy or unhealthy, helpful or harmful, depending on why and how you love someone else and are loved by someone else. By itself, love is never enough to sustain a relationship.
But there’s no way on God’s Green Earth this is her fault alone. There were times when I saw huge red flags. Instead of trying to figure out what in the world was wrong, I just plowed ahead. I’d buy more flowers, or candy, or do more chores around the house. I was a “good” husband in every sense of the word. But what I wasn’t doing was paying attention to the right things. She wasn’t telling me there wasn’t a problem but there was. And instead of saying something, I ignored all of the signals.
Love is one of the most profound emotions known to human beings. There are many kinds of love, but most people seek its expression in a romantic relationship with a compatible partner. For many, romantic relationships comprise the most meaningful aspect of life, providing a source of deep fulfillment. The need for human connection appears to be innate, but the ability to form healthy, loving relationships is learned. A great deal of evidence suggests that the ability to form a stable relationship begins in infancy, in a child's earliest experiences with a caregiver who reliably meets the infant's needs for food, care, warmth, protection, stimulation, and social contact. Such relationships are not destiny, but they appear to establish deeply ingrained patterns of relating to others. Failed relationships happen for many reasons, and the failure of a relationship is often a source of great psychological anguish. Most people have to work consciously to master the skills necessary to make relationships endure and flourish. 

Keeping outside relationships and interests alive. Despite the claims of romantic fiction or movies, no one person can meet all of your needs. In fact, expecting too much from your partner can put unhealthy pressure on the relationship. To stimulate and enrich your romantic relationship, it’s important to preserve connections with family and friends and maintain hobbies and interests outside of the relationship as well.
And the only thing that can save you and your partner, that can cushion you both to the hard landing of human fallibility, is an unerring respect for one another, the fact that you hold each other in high esteem, believe in one another—often more than you each believe in yourselves—and trust that your partner is doing his/her best with what they’ve got.
Susan breaks this down using a form of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. She explains that couples who are functioning on the lowest level — survival— often stay together out of necessity. Couples functioning at the highest level— actualization—are not only making one another happy, but also helping each other grow in the right direction, so they tend to stay together, too.
Well since so many women nowadays are sleeping around with so many different men at one time which will make it very difficult for many of us good innocent men trying to meet a good woman to have a serious relationship with. And unfortunately most of these very pathetic low life loser women are going for the rich type of men since these women are nothing but users and losers altogether since they're taking advantage of these men just to get the real expensive gifts that most of these men will buy for them anyway which is real sad. I do feel very bad for these men that are really being taken for a free ride by these women since they're actually paying these Golddiggers to please them anyway and are very much using these women as well. So finding real love Online is very much Dangerous and risky as well either way you look at it.
The game show If You Are the One, titled after Chinese personal ads, featured provocative contestants making sexual allusions and the show reportedly ran afoul of authorities and had to change its approach.[77] The two-host format involves a panel of 24 single women questioning a man to decide if he'll remain on the show; if he survives, he can choose a girl to date; the show gained notoriety for controversial remarks and opinions such as model Ma Nuo saying she'd prefer to "weep in a BMW than laugh on a bike", who was later banned from making appearances.[78]
A 2011 class action lawsuit alleged Match.com failed to remove inactive profiles, did not accurately disclose the number of active members, and does not police its site for fake profiles;[41] the inclusion of expired and spam profiles as valid served to both artificially inflate the total number of profiles and camouflage a skewed gender ratio in which active users were disproportionately single males.[42] The suit claimed up to 60 percent were inactive profiles, fake or fraudulent users.[43] Some of the spam profiles were alleged to be using images of porn actresses, models, or people from other dating sites.[44] Former employees alleged Match routinely and intentionally over-represented the number of active members on the website and a huge percentage were not real members but 'filler profiles'.[45]
×